How much time do you spend preparing for a party or event? In general, I don’t spend much time. For some reason today is different. I am preparing to go to a wedding with my spouse (her friends) and we spent at least an hour discussing what we would both wear (okay 55 minutes on her and 5 minutes on me). It came to me that I actually should prepare a little for tonight’s small talk. Then as I was writing that I decided I sounded like a complete geek thinking about small talk for a wedding. Anyway, I marched onward and here is what I came up with:
- Sports Talk – Well this is a particularaly easy topic for me because I generally watch ESPN every morning while I workout and have a decent knowledge of current events. Some starter topics here include any big games that just got played (lop-sided defeats, nail biters, or games with a lot on the line). Another topic is injuries of big players as that could lead into an interesting discussion about similar injuries for all parties in the conversation (if you can stomach that). You can talk about the latest sports scandal with performance enhancing drugs, the latest big athelete arrested for being stupid, etc. Any recent blockbuster deals or trades are always interesting especially in the NFL, NBA, or MLB. So I quickly realized that Sports is a safe fallback because I can list topics here for days…
- Go Local – Assuming the other person in the conversation is from the same area and didn’t fly in from somewhere else then local gossip and news stories could be a great conversation starter. Did you see the latest discusion on the transportation system? What do you think about a new sports stadium or the existing one? Wouldn’t it be great if we could get some really good broadway shows to come to our city? You can actually ask them to talk about where they are originally from as well and perhaps how where you are now differs from where they grew up. NOTE: unless you like a good argument, you should stay away from local politics at least until you know the other person better.
- Family Talk – So I didn’t say making fun of THEIR family although your family is certainly fair game. You can find out how many siblings the other person has or how many children they may have. Once you know that you can ask questions about each of them unless they seem uncomfortable with any questions (some people don’t like talking about their family). You can definitely talk about spouses (significnat others) and kids for quite some time. Be careful though to not be the only person talking about their kids at a table of single people or you will definitely not be popular for long. Also, it’s probably not best to talk about spouses when they are sitting next to you unless you like sleeping on the couch.
- Music – This can be a real natural conversation because normally at parties music is playing. You can ask about their favorite genre, favorite music groups, worst music groups, etc. You can also talk about recent trends in music and people that are really popular right now. In general there are always a few really controversial and popular music acts to discuss (lady Gaga, Kanye West, Britney Spears – one of them is almost always in a scandal of some sorts). You can also talk about karaoke and what songs you always hear, what you would sing (careful… you may end up singing).
- Movies – Who doesn’t love the movies? This is generally a great topic that will take off. You can talk about really hot current movies (whatever is leading at the box office) or you can go with best/worst movies of all time. Another fun conversation is the best/worst movies that Sylvester Stallone has been in (or name any actor/actress really). This can actually be a lot of fun especially if you have a decent size group and people that are even moderately outgoing. You can also talk about movies that cost a fortune and if you can really tell WaterWorld versus Avatar, etc.
- TV Shows – Pretty much everyone will have a favorite TV show (unless you get one of those people that thinks TV is a total waste of time). You can ask about the latest reality TV shows (American Idol, Biggest Loser, Amazing Race, etc.). You can talk about big hits and flops of the TV season (who is being cancelled, etc.). If the person could only watch one TV show per week what would it be? What is their favorite TV show of all time (think about it, it’s a tough decision)? You can even talk about TV fights with the spouse/kids and your gratitude to the inventor of the DVR.
- Celebrities and Scandals – This can always be interesting. There will almost always be a celebrity saying or doing something absolutely outrageous. You can talk about who cheated on who, who is breaking up, who got caught doing something illegal, and other similar topics (surely 2 out of those 3 will have happened in the last week). You can talk about celebrity causes good/bad and how everyone feels about them. You can ask who their favorite/least favorite celebrities are, who their heros were growing up, etc. You can also go to top 10 people that you would love to meet some day and derivatives of that.
- Vacations – You can talk about the best vacation you ever took (don’t talk about how much you spent) and what you would recommend or not about it (a cruise, etc.). You can pull some places that you would love to go to someday from your bucket list (things you want to do before you die – a topic on its own). This is a great opportunity to get ideas for your next vacation by hearing what they did or where they like to go. This could lead you to a much better understanding of the likes/dislikes of the other people at the party.
- Jobs – It’s generally pretty easy to get people to talk about what they do for a living since it consumes so much of their waking hours (usually). You can and should though really listen and want to know about it or just don’t bring it up. It’s pretty easy to tell if you really aren’t interested. You can liven it up a bit by talking about your bosses, co-workers, etc. Think of the TV Show “The Office” and if that parallels anything at their work or your work. Sometimes ideas like that can make discussions about work more interesting and at a level where everyone can participate in the conversation.
- Weather – If you are absolutely getting nowhere with any other conversation you can give the weather a shot. Man, it’s been cold/hot/wet/dry lately hasn’t it? It’s such a pain when it is cold/hot/wet/dry because it always effects my morning commute, evening commute, etc.
Okay, so I actually feel like I could carry on a decent conversation or two now that I have collected my thoughts. I’m also 100% convinced about how much of a nerd I am for having to think so hard about this today. Well, hopefully my random thoughts and preparation for the wedding will help others out if they find themselves in a similar situation. If I’m lucky I’ll get to talk a lot about people’s vacations and World travels…
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